..when you are having a conversation with someone, and in the middle of it they slip in as casually as if they were mentioning that the bus was full, "...he's had a few problems and slips. Apparently the last time he went back to the home was after retaliating and punching an ostrich in the face..." - well, I dare you not to be incapable of finding that inherently amusing.
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Emsbabee
Pro - Monday, 20. Apr, 2009 @ 19:00:38
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chrisglos
- Monday, 20. Apr, 2009 @ 19:30:39
Well that's just it - I don't really know much more. I was so broadsided by that little gem...
Funnily enough, it sort of started with you actually. I was having a coffee and my friend came in to join me, and she was talking about something or other (attentive listener me, no wonder the ladies love me) involving dodgy neighbours who seem quite intimidating. Which bought to mind your little tale about a neighbourly pyscho. It then progressed to her trip to Devon-ish area this weekend and apparently in the flat next to her dads theres a man who is an owl breeder. Personally, I've never heard of them before, but I guess they exist. We found this slightly bizarre as even though my knowledge of ecosystems and animal behaviour is not on a par with Bill Oddie, I was pretty convinced owls aren't famous for being beach dwellers. It then came to light that said owl fancier is what you might politely call 'challenged', thus the theory was concocted by us that perhaps they're really seagulls that he glues bits of pipe cleaner and hair clippings to, to make them look like owls and sell them to japanese harry potter fans via the internet. Um, yes. And from this it transpired that he's got a bit of a chequered history on the mental / alcohol side of things, and the tipping point to him reinventing himself and rehabilitation via the medium of owl mentoring, was the aforementioned brush with the ostrich.
Sadly I can't remember the full build up to the sentence, but it involved getting in to a 'to-do' somehow in a field where an ostrich took offence to the intrusion on his patch and started giving it some 'whats your problem, son'...and in his confused interpretation within his brain, responded with the classic fight-or-flight response of being under threat.
I cried. With laughter.-
Wow, he sounds incredible! I'd love to see him take on a llama.
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chrisglos
- Tuesday, 21. Apr, 2009 @ 10:20:38
I found out even more last night, and it just gets better.
I will update later with the following nuggets of gold: his bird obsession might stem from two ostrich eggs held as a child, hes punched twice to impress his girlfriend, he doesnt actually owl breed but is an obsessed 'birdman'.
I never thought anything would top that, but....are you sitting down because you might love this even more....all I shall say for now is someone in a crowded room during an acoustic open mike set saying 'you should see my grannys fanny. Oh, but shes dead'. Priceless. -
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I HAVE to know the rest of that story.